Yes dad. Im talking about you.
Dear friend.
I know your hurting.. I know your in pain beyond belief, i know your crying and bleeding, but even with all these things. Your not alone.. Your never alone. You have me and you always will, i know im a huge contribution to the reason you cut, and i fucking hate my self for that. When we got into our relationship i promised you i would make you better, make you a happier person, and i did for the first six months ( Nine if you cound the unofficial time). Then that one day i slipped up and cut after six clean months, thats when it all started messing up.. We both cut for the best part of a week, but then went back to our old ways. But then it all got too much, the distance got too much, so after three weeks of conisderation i decided to end the relationship as i thought it might help once you got over me.. But now, a month later, even though we have both entered new relationships ( yours going better than mine since a certian cunt who i know you hate decided i ’ was fat, and part of the emo freaksquad as he called it) we are both hurting. And missing each other, the seperation causeing more hurt than the distance. And for this im sorry, but i would just like to say;
I know your with Ashleigh, but i also know your not 100% happy. I know that she doesnt fully understand, but what i do know is she does care and she does love you. Even though right now you think she doesnt.
Mason is your bestfriend, and although he sometimes apears to care more about himself and his sex life, he cares.. And you know it even if you dont see it
Most of all, i care. I always have, since the day i met you. I never will stop caring even if were just friends. That promise you made me, i want you too keep that and i know its hard for you but you can doo it. You kept if for six months so you can do it again.. I don’t want you to have anymore marks on your perfect perfect skin.. Stay strong and make those sure those butterflys black.
I love you. <3
Seeing how happy you became made me think id made the right choice. When you replied ’ Im great thanks, im happy!!’ to my texts it made me think id done whats right.. The way we both seemed to cheer up allot made me think i had made the right choice.. But today, for the first time since i made that choice.. I needed you. I wanted you, You were always there, just a phone call away to help stop me take blades to my self. For the first time since i decided to finish it i wanted you to comfort me.. The worst part is, im being a selfish motherfucker about it… I feel selfish for wanting to bring you back into it.. So i didn’t bother talking to you what ever… Sorta wishing i had now.. Fucked up my ’ clean ’ time
